How Did You Get Here with Verastic
Short story: Those who are doing it do not have two heads.
Long story: Welcome to How Did You Get Here with Verastic - the podcast where real people share real stories about the winding, messy, hilarious, and sometimes miraculous journeys that got them here. No fluff, and no curated Instagram perfection. Just raw, authentic conversations that inspire you to believe that if they can do it, so can you.
As our Nigerian parents loved to remind us: Those who are doing it do not have two heads. Translation? The people you admire aren’t superheroes; they’re humans with struggles, detours, wild stories, and twenty-four hours in a day, just like you.
So, if you’ve ever wondered how someone survived heartbreak, built a career from scratch, moved continents, reinvented themselves, or turned pain into power, pull up a chair. This is where truth meets laughter, and where you get the audacity to believe that your own “getting here” is absolutely possible. I'm just here as your good-smelling guide.
E-mail: hello@verastic.com
How Did You Get Here with Verastic
EP 20: What About Sex During Divorce? FT. Berry Dakara
Before I filed for divorce - in fact, before I even walked away from my marriage - I had never given a moment's thought to sex (or lack of it) during a divorce. I also did not know that the legal laws for sexing while divorcing varied from State to State. In my State, Maryland, for example, it is illegal to have sex with someone who is not your spouse, until your divorce is final. It does not matter if you are legally separated.
It was only when I separated from The Boy that I started receiving questions about my sex life. People wanted to know what who I was doing and how I was coping [without sex] and when last I had sex, etc. And then it dawned on me that I had never thought about the quality of my sex life while I was divorcing. But then again, the quality of my sex life while I was married was not memorable either.
In this week's episode, I have our very own Berry Dakara! Berry Dakara is currently going through divorce, and recently, she mentioned publicly on her Instagram that she had not had sex in a while. So, I thought to myself, well, why stop there? Let's go on the podcast and have an even more intimate conversation about sex. So, here we are.
Berry Dakara is a single-mother of one very beautiful daughter, Coco. She has worn a few hats as a Content Creator, starting with her first blog, the Aje-Butter's Guide to NYSC, and then her personal blog also named Berry Dakara. She has a Youtube channel that she hopes to resurrect one day, but her focus right now is on her podcast - Mommy Oyoyo - which she started in 2019 as a platform to talk about anything and everything motherhood from the modern African woman's perspective.
Berry is Nigerian (half Ogoni-half Igbo) and has lived in the US for over 20 years. She enjoys spending time with her family, friends, but also treasures time alone to herself. Berry is a chronic oversharer (just check her Instagram posts) but does not plan to promote this episode on Facebook so her daddy will not scold her. Yes, of course, she's a punk. You can connect with Berry Dakara on Twitter, and you can connect with the Mommy Oyoyo Podcast on Instagram too.
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